November 14, 2004

• My The_Clowne_from_Clown  blog has a new piece up, you can comment there if you wish but I will answer your comments from this blog.

  
  

  The Clowne blog is in prose and is my reality.

  
  

   

  
  

  “George Dixon”
  

  
  

  ———————–
  

  
  

  “Evening All…”
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Most of you would not have heard of
  

  
  

  “Dixon Of Dock Green”
  

  
  

  On the TV, in the late fifties, early sixties.
  

  
  

  The laid-back copper who had inspired
  

  
  

  Many a person to become a policeman.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  It was a real George Dixon,
  

  
  

  (And a real name, this once;)
  

  
  

  That had given me one of my most shocking cases.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  In the strangely named village of Piddletrenthide,
  

  
  

  Neighbours reported noises from a chocolate-box cottage.
  

  
  

  My mate and I went to it
  

  
  

  To find the front door wide open,
  

  
  

  And to find the bodies of a woman and  three small children.
  

  
  

  A fourth, a little girl, was hiding in the garden, in deep shock.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Her daddy had killed her family because “mummy had kissed another man.”
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  A week later,
  

  
  

  A call came through
  

  
  

  That a man was sleeping rough on Portland.
  

  
  

  As no one had escaped from the prison over there
  

  
  

  We guessed it could have been the brutal killer,
  

  
  

  A one “George Dixon”.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  I myself, found the man near a cliff,
  

  
  

  I was so tempted to push the bastard over,
  

  
  

  I am sure everyone would have turned a blind eye…
  

  
  

  But I upheld the law
  

  
  

  For him to get ten lousy years.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  The other prisoners in the jail where he went
  

  
  

  Did what perhaps I should have done,
  

  
  

  But why George Dixon was on that jail roof
  

  
  

  We shall never know.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  —
  

  
  

  Charlie The Copper.
  

  
  

  ___________________

  
  

   

  
  

  
  

  “The Scream”
  

  
  

  ——————–
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  What does
  

  
  

  “A burning bar of soap” mean?
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  A policeman’s lot is not a happy one,
  

  
  

  As they sung in “The Pirates Of Penzanze.”
  

  
  

  Upstairs was the wife
  

  
  

  And our two little ones,
  

  
  

  And there I was filling in my crime sheets
  

  
  

  In the days before computers.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  I heard a scream
  

  
  

  And looked out of the window
  

  
  

  I couldn’t see anything,
  

  
  

  But then there was another scream.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  I grabbed my tunic and helmet
  

  
  

  And walked outside
  

  
  

  And saw nothing.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  I walked out into the village street,
  

  
  

  Not a soul was to be seen.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  After a while, I called it a night
  

  
  

  Went to bed and slept.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  The next night I was in bed
  

  
  

  When the misses woke me and said
  

  
  

  “Charlie, I just heard a woman scream!”
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  This time it was in jim-jams and slippers
  

  
  

  When I walked into the empty street.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Then there it was, a scream,
  

  
  

  A scream that sent shivers through my bones,
  

  
  

  And it was coming from the house across the street.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  “Do be careful luv!” My wife was by me in her dressing gown
  

  
  

  And giving me my truncheon.
  

  
  

  The blood-curdling scream hit up again
  

  
  

  Then I banged on the door.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  “Oh, sugar!” A man’s voice shouted,
  

  
  

  I was about to smash the window
  

  
  

  When our young married neighbours came to the door
  

  
  

  Dressed in Shakespearean costumes.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  They had been practising their roles
  

  
  

  In the forthcoming production of Macbeth.
  

  
  

  Guess who was playing Lady Macduff
  

  
  

  Watching her children being killed?
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  “Next time” I sighed, “Do tell me first!”
  

  
  

  My kids were out on the street
  

  
  

  And a police car could be heard,
  

  
  

  For my wife had rung for help.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  We got given two tickets fot the production
  

  
  

  It was only an amateur affair,
  

  
  

  But “Lady Macduff” gave a performance
  

  
  

  Worthy of an Oscar,
  

  
  

  And I shivered inside when she screamed,
  

  
  

  And I thought about
  

  
  

  “A burning bar of soap”.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  —
  

  
  

  Charlie The Copper
  

  • 4:02 am
  • 42 Comments