July 31, 2004
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Today I have The_Clowne_from_Clown
site up but I will not leave you without a poem, and if I answer you from this site or that, I will answer you. (There is no need to sign both blogs!)
Meanwhile, to confuse you and annoy some of you, one of my Texts. From my book called “Texts”, sadly, long out of print!
Text Ethelred the Unready.
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Ethelred the Unready enjoyed the circus, especially the clowns who made his tits pop out of his kingly frock in this dark satire of the Canutes from hell. (& its not “knut” as the BBC will have it, & that’s straight from the horses anus. he was not nutty just because he wanted to prove that he was not greater than God, if that is the legend) “What an incredable sunset” said Ethelred inbetween prayers to the Goddess of Milton Green.
If Canute was always ready to burn Alfred’s cakes, well, the cakes of the old woman he was minding for her. Danes to arms, rally, rally! they cried out of the biscuit tin, and Alfred was cooking and Canute was drowning and Ethelred the Unready was deep in prayer to the Goddess of Milton Green. No wonder the danes could rape the women and play chess with the men at freedom, as one Dane asked a child “Have you seen the latest “Rosie & Jim” video? It lasts 120 minutes. Watch it whilst I rape your mother, there’s a good boy.”
Why was Ethelred praying to the Goddess of Milton Green? It’s hard to tell, his form of anglo-saxon is almost unknown, for forget the green knight, forget beowolf or whatever he was called, for anglo saxon was not like that, and even the word cvnte was polite, in fact that is what they called canute. A Cvnte.
Still, Ethelred was ready for one thing, that was getting dressed up as a New York cop, why he did this no one really knows, after all he wasn’t gay nor was he an officer of the law, he was just an ordinally bloke who happened to be king. Edgar was not happy you know, there were Danes to the left of him, Danes to the right of him, and even one in him, and all uncle Ethelred the Unready did was pray, dressed in a cop’s uniform like an unicorn on heat.
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Horace Smith Esq. (the fictious writer of the texts, but not the book-author’s name)
Comments (25)
This is one of the most organized of disorganized stories I have ever read. I can’t imagine anyone not high on something having the abilities to write something so confusing. You have a real knack for the whacky and I think it’s born in the use of it.
Regards,
Let me say this, I was not high on ANYTHING when I wrote the texts. Nor am I mad just because my pet has three heads. I am just creative in the sense Beckett, Joyce and so on are.
I am honored and flattered by your visit and comment, m’lord.
Did you say the word mad, I didn’t say the word mad. Just because you have a pet with 3 heads I would never say mad, whacky but not mad. And, high, I think high was a thing in the past, even more so then than now as it wasn’t illegal. I think looking at so many of the great artists of prose, poetry, art, music, who proved out to be a bit on the mad side, a bit on the gay side, a bit on the high side there was a lot of genius going on. Would you disassociate yourself from them? Maybe we could all use a bit of the whacky to trip on now and then. And, is your temper flaring a little. I see your nostrils puffing at the wind, from here.
Bloody hell, LE is worse than my ex-wife!
You couldn’t be so damn lucky.
dear lord …you are over my head ….however i will be back every now and again cuz i might just learn something…thanks for stopping by and the point i was hoping to make about pms was that sometimes women (ie..my daughters) use that as a way to get away with just plain being bitchy….i ,however. never did that….just ask my 3 husbands…well 2 ….one is dead…stop by agian when u can
Connie
Wow! I think you write beautifully. you have a real talent!! Well thank you for visitying my site and i made the corrections!!!!LOL!!!!!!! I want to publish my work,too!!!! Um…i was wondering if you could read my other poems and tell me wat you think. you are very helpful. i will use any help i can get. than you.
sidra
Ah, I’m so glad someone got my Mrs. Kerry joke . . . I thought it had fallen on too-young-to-understand deaf ears.
And a unicorn on heat, eh?
Lord Pineapple, This was interesting. You are brillant, however DARK Lean a little into the light.
Is that picture of George Jung, the famous Columbian Cocaine lord?
I love your creativity! It is so random and spontaneous, which makes it beautiful!
Yeah I think I will open all my poetic archives back up. Closing it up was part of the new layout. LOL. Thanks for your insight. =)
that was…strange…but i enjoyed it.
Goddess of Milton Greene= Marilyn Monroe, Canute was the Christian one who wanted to teach his syncophantic nobles that the sea did not obey him, And Ethelred the Unready was called so because he would PAY (maybe pray too but his murderous revenge against the English Danes is surely not what a holy man does) the Danes in Denmark the Danegild to stay away from the English…until they ran out of money and went again to Ethelred who would raise money from his subjects to pay the raiding Danes again. Thanks for this roundabout history lesson.
How many other books have you written. I am always surprised when I get to your site to read your entries. They are varied and always interesting.
I know what you mean about reading other blogs. I enjoy that more than writing them too sometimes.
I recall three Miltons. John, Berle, and the guy who had a butcher down the street from where I grew up, but no Milton Green.
Thank you so much for the feedback on my poem. I truly appreciate it.
Oddly enough a majority of the poems I’ve written many years ago had a sing-song standard feel to them. In my opinion, too juvenile and perhaps predictable for someone to have written at that age.
There were but a handful of poems that were “not neat” nor “hammer home a story” – most of which were my favorite.
It’ll be interesting to get feedback on newer writings in the future. I’ll be posting old ones just to see where I might be able to take my writing once I pick it up. Like the saying goes, “you won’t know where you’re going until you know where you’ve been.”
Again, many thanks, and I look forward to exploring your many writings (as I’ve noticed you have an entire webpage listing you numerous aliases!).
Take care…
xoxoxo,
Darling Niki
http://www.darlingniki.org
… are you dark enough, darling?
MiLord…as always your writing is…I shall call it as I refer to you most brilliant…..
Sprinting across the terrain, clutching gilded boxing gloves, cometh Three Headed Sarahs! And she gives a cruel cry:
“I’m going to flog you until you shit molton lava, and hijack your momma’s airplane!”
Brilliant!
That was rather fun to read, even if I didn’t understand what was going on.
I agree with Alice. ryc: Aww, don’t begrudge me the few days that I have to travel. It’s very rare for me… And you’re welcome.
Teehee, you are so varied. I don’t know how you manage serious, funny, quirky, bizarre.
Thanks for the comment regarding “C’mon Milady.” I would love to hear some Celt-styled music written for it. I think it would be beautiful, indeed. Thank you again.
Jim
Is there anything you can’t write???
As always, your writing amazes me…