cancer-girl
the pain is there
everyday it’s there
eating eating into me
destroying my body
and my mind.
oh little daughter
how much it hurts me
to cuddle you,
to smile at you,
to write this poem
upon this page.
everyday it is there
it won’t go away
it has no where to go
but to attack me
until it has won
and i am dead.
if you ever read this poem
my little one,
let me remind you
that the biggest pain of all
is the pain of knowing
i will never see you grow up.
that is the real cancer my child,
the real pain.
—
Ingar Gǿrse
—
(Which I suppose leads neatly to..)
“Four a.m.”
The pain-killer has worn off,
I make a cup of tea.
It is just about 4 a.m.
And on this summer morning
The first birds start to sing.
I write my sermon,
And look up to God in the sky
For inspiration.
I drink my tea,
It has gone cold.
I sigh,
There are worse things in this world
Than a cold cup of tea.
I hold my back,
It aches like mad.
There are worse things in this world
Than a bad back.
I have a funeral today
Of a young mother.
There are no worse things in this world.
I make myself another cup of tea.
I expect this one will also turn cold
Before I remember to drink it.
—
The Reverend Tobias Trontby †
Comments (37)
you know, my emotions always, always suited with your words everytime i read them. i wonder how you manage to fit everything at one point.
“the biggest pain of all is the pain of knowing i will never see you grow up.that is the real cancer my child. the real pain.”
should i say more?
It’s been a while since I have commented on your blog. I just want to say that the cancer-girl poem is really intense thanks for sharing. Peace…Jake
I always love the Reverend.
~V
Wonderful poems. Bodily aches and pains remind us at times of our far too human condition.
Beautiful, sad, and painful….great job Lord P.
I always know that I will be touched when I come here. Sometimes I don’t – because I know – and sometimes I come and leave quietly – and sometimes I have to pause and tell you that I have been – touched.
theyre so sad and painful…but you did such a very good job on both of them.
Wonderful stuff.
I tip my hat to you my Lord! You truly outshine me in eroticism …
Beautiful works…my mom died from Breast cancer when I was 16, every milestone sine I wish she was with me in the physical…who knows, maybe she is.
-M
Those are beautiful. The cancer one hits home. 4 years ago I had to sit down with my children and tell them that I had cancer and wasn’t sure what the outcome would be, but I wanted them in on everything from the very beginning so there would not have to be so much processing of grief after I was gone, if that was the way it was meant to be. I was very blessed in the outcome!
No, I didn’t write the poem on my site. Wish I could take credit for it, but I can’t. Glad you stopped by!
Hey thanks for the subscription. I aim to please but sometimes miss. Peace…jake
OMG, that’s too funny about the wedding! That’s got to be a feeling you didn’t soon forget! LOL!!!
oh i left a comment regarding the comment you put in my post in your previous entry.
oops.
4 a.m. is a great poem.
Wonderful. So so beautifully written.
I’m so depressed now. sigh
No, not depressing. The person is dealing with it. Commentary on real life drama. There are pages that burn with Truth, these would shed some Hope. And yeah, L.P. it was me not GWB. I have got to pay some attention to a site or stay away altogether, but alas, too much to do, thought by shutting down I would accomplish more —- not so very true. Have a great day today – keep writing!!
msg on my site the rest of the story good day! do you know of Paul Harvey there?
MiLord…did not come here to cry
but your first poem left me very emotional
your second one…stark reality of life baby
Awww……..I’m glad you are in favor of the leaves.
You always have the most interesting topics for your poems
I like it when you write about women……..sometimes men can’t capture such things, but I thought your blind date poem was quite true to life.
Props to you
I’ll send the white knight in abox attached to a flying kite….
’til then!
dear lord, what inspired this series of tragic poems? Pierced my soul. Yes, I understand exactly what these two poems mean, and feel.
Had a good friend die of luekemia a couple of years ago …. watched her fade away day by day…
Take care.
Very tragic. I’m all weepy eyed now.
Spectacular writing on a sad sad subject.
~lisa
Pain is such a dramatic and powerful force but it cannot escape us unless we cope somehow and control it.
M.A.
Thank you so much for the very kind comment, it made my day.
I thought to leave a snakey reply to your comment, which was very thoughtful I thought, and honestly, I thought it honest, and I do feel terrible silly about what I posted and thankgod hardly anybody has been by but I still keep posting it and hiding it, anyway it was the comment about the surreality of sex, yes, I agree, and then about the snake joining in, that was so Edenic of you to mention that, and psychic too, but anyway, I read many poems here, many that I had already read, and mygoddearfellow, they’re an awesome offering. Such simplicity, short, oblique kinds of rhyming, rhythmically clipped, it often feels like that to me who is wordy, piling clause upon clause, but the heart of each poem, wow, packs a punch. The way you can so enter into an experience through the persona that you have created is remarkable, Keats’ ‘negative capability’ taken to a zenith… xo
i just came from the bird with a good laugh, only to come to such a sad painful moment, i am always in wonder at your poems.
Amazing the first one. So true
My gosh – how much pain in just a few words? And yet, eloquence. I’m sure his cup went cold once again.
Saul of Tarsus was indeed chief among the ones who He came to save. There are no sins too great for a God like ours to cleanse.
The poems are wonderful, and debauched at the same time. So, you see, the ones that have this element are difficult to “enjoy” (impossible) though brilliant they may be.
Lean into the Light dear friend and have a good day!
I have one of my daughter in law who has a breast cancer with surgery and now chemo . She is 36 years old . It ‘s why your first poem moves me deeply . THIS POEM IS BEAUTIFUL .
In friendship
Michel
very real words even if “written by fictional” persons lord ouch thanx magi
Beautiful and heartbreaking.
When I read about a child and cancer, sorry, but I hurriedly skipped to the next poem. But I could read about the Reverend all day. Great graduation from small annoyances (though with you English, perhaps, a cold cup of tea is not a trivial matter), to medium to tragic.
By the way, thanks for your kind comments to me and my other me, Cricket on the Hearth.
Cancer girl. Your poems are real life. I can relate to that one. Have a good week-end. L.P. RITA
Excellent
That is quite alright………how are you and the sky getting along lately???
………..and what tickled your fancy today…..surely something….
Ta Ta, then!